Don't be nice too!!!!

Don't be nice too!!!!

Try to always do what they expect you to others, and is keen not to hurt their feelings, to help friends and relatives whenever they need you and avoid harassment even if provoked your anger, if you are a nice person and you love and ensure that describes you people so.

However if carefully think of attitudes ' kind ' you'll discover it's often ' defeatist ' attitudes was saying yes when I should say no, or pretends to calm when angry, or resort to lying to you fears hurt the feelings of others, and may bear burdens on your so as not to embarrass people dear to you. You are to maintain interpersonal gracefully committed many errors that may negatively affect your business and social relationships.

One of the biggest mistakes of the of a gentleness was the tendency to perfection, great pressure, and strenuous effort requires for self-assertion, and do various tasks to the fullest, as well as the permanent gratification of others.

We must here clarify that try to access to perfect in itself is not a flaw, but it becomes wrong when you might develop unrealistic standards for yourself, or cause you don't have an effort or time or money, or when they become an obsession to impede your performance for your business.

The first step to correcting this error is to believe (not mere words) that there is a full and accept your shortcomings, then comes the realization that perfection is not the only way to acquire the acceptance of others.

Besides the tendency for perfect Duke Robinson summarizes in writing ' don't be too nice ' other errors where the friendly people on a daily basis, including:

-Greater commitments from your energy: usually without feel drop us kindness in trouble, either say no to someone you love asks us something you feel selfish and guilty, or try to do whatever we are asked, ruled our energy.

-Not to say what you want: and may resort to it because you think it's inappropriate socially, or do not want to look weak, or afraid of rejection or do not want to cause embarrassment to the one you love.In any case, the non-disclosure of your feelings and your requirements and keep what you want for others your will to mental illness and may also dissipate organic features of your personality.

-Suppress your anger: the point here is to maintain calm nerves while you boil as a result of exploitation of others you or harm to your feelings, which is some kind of falsification and lying to oneself and to others, and to not suppress your anger does not mean start to arise as the volcano, all you have to show the others to conduct harassing you so as not to duplicate.

-Avoid the truth: to be nice always you often avoid telling the truth so as not to embarrass others but that does not help you and not them, you must tell the truth with humility and sensitivity.

For example: If saltak your wife what you think about Chinese potato which you do not like, do not have to lie and say it was fantastic, there is no need to be rude and say it was bad, but you can answer that you usually like potatoes from her hand but tastes this time was slightly different.Thus came the impasse with fewer losses.

People can often do things that others expect of them, and trying to satisfy their requirements, without that hurt their feelings, without losing their temper. When attacked by others without discretion, maintain their kindness and calm.

However, these friendly people as corrupt, these good intentions, help others, and spoke and acted with all this wonderful level of tact, are feeling the fatigue and frustration and lack of self-confidence.

These behaviors in the friendly persons in good faith, in the usual way, reverse the impact their relationships, and extracted their delight.

The day after our behaviors, terrible madness, and steals valuable time and energy are the most precious asset we have, and summarizes these behaviors with nine errors counterproductive, and is worthwhile because we little thought and effort we can stop doing:

• To free ourselves from the obligation to others ' expectations of us, we are not convinced.

• Can say: no, if necessary, and that pure ourselves take no stand.

• Tell others what we want from them, and that we receive.

• To express our anger in a way that heals, and preserve our relationship.

• To respond effectively when security people or criticize without discretion.

• To inform our friends the truth when air.

• Take care to others without the burden of attempting to manage their lives.

• To help our friends and your loved ones who tend to destroy themselves to regain their mental health.

• Take our competence, benefiting us when faced with pain and grief.

It is well known that women suffer greater social pressure than men to be kind, and most people think that men don't have the same level of kindness of women, but whether you're a man or a woman, nice nice you may be repeatedly falling into these nine errors to your damage.

To get rid of minor mistakes does not mean stop to be nice, but just help us rationalize additional effort made to keep on dealing gently at all times often come at the expense of our nerve and our comfort.

Of the book don't be too nice to author Duke Robinson.